Tuesday, May 23, 2006

What Chou Talkin' Bout Willis?

Ok, so I am readying myself for a trek across the prairie. A trek that includes me as "the collectives" sherpa, and Mother.

To say I am a bit panicked. Well that is about on the money. Although, I really am about the coolest M'er F'er on the planet.

I mean really, my children have my ass trained.

So I am talking with my Brother, about packing, and the trip, and the fact that we will just be soooo out of routine, ad naseum....

My Brother says "man, you need to calm down".

First off I got to honest with you, I was simply complaining...I wasn't "excited" or flipping out..

However I was quick to point out my past experiences with "the collective", because I guess my Brother has a short memory.

Here is a conversation that transpired between me and my Brother. I will call him Rico again, you know like the song Rico Suave, because he hates when I do that)

Rico: "Stop freaking out, it isn't like you are alone. We will help. It will be fun."

Me: "OK, person with one daughter that has never been on a drive over 5 hours with her"

Rico: "WE will help."

Me: "Yeah I know how that works. (I then went into a long diatribe about how people told me that at Grandma's funeral, and how Dash somehow ended up in a freshly dug grave, in front of God and everyone)

Rico: "Oh, it will be fine."

Me: "Rico, my daughter has broken her arms. They do things, they require supervision. Please do not tell me I am dramatic here...For Gods sake. Pink Ninja, has had 2 broken arms, and Dash fell in a grave, in front of God and everyone."

Rico: "Calm Down"

Me: "Dash just peed at the park in front of God and everyone."

Rico: "Yeah, that was weird."

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