Monday, July 31, 2006 vewy qwiet

I am out of books. Out. I think I read 3 in the last two weeks. SO it is off to the pubic library. With the collective.

I feel like a wounded gazelle, with a couple of jackels at my heels. Dash is usually great at the library, Pink Ninja tends to like the sound of her own out of doors voice, and the sound her shoes make while running.

I remain a bit wounded, so I am unable to chase, or carry. This could be bad.

If they are good, there will be no discussion about this outing. If they misbehave, you will read about it.

Voodoo Child

Well, I stand up next to a mountain
And I chop it down with the edge of my hand
Well, I pick up all the pieces and make an island
Might even raise a little sand

~Jimi Hendrix

Just when I think Pink Ninja cannot become MORE autonmous, she suprises me. She is my thin, wiry, tough, no fear child. She thinks she runs the show. I am surprised she can walk, because she has her Father wrapped around her finger. Sometimes the laws of physics, can be altered if you are cute enough.

Two days ago I note she has acquired a new way of avoiding the word no.

I am lying on the couch recuperating, and she is doing something she shouldn't be doing. So I read her the riot act. In turn, she scowls at me, lowering eyebrows, and makes "go away", and "push" actions for minutes at a time. It is a dance with her, elaborate gesturing. It is mesmerizing, all of these hand gestures and body movements.

Now I must find the voodoo doll with the marsupial pouch, pins in the belly, and the bum knee.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

As Good as Used...

I would like to tell all yawl I am as good as new. I am not. I am about 80%. The other 20% is just tired, an a little foggy yet.

The procedure went fine. My incisions are small, one of them appears healed already. The other incision is around my navel, and I cannot thank the Dr. Enough for doing a bit of "reconstructive surgery" to my poor navel....I will wait with the thank you until I am healed.

I woke up rolling down the hall from surgery. They turned a corner,and wham I was awake. Oh, and in typical fashion I found a person next to me that was equally as chatty. The nurses were in awe, that the two of us were yammering away. I suppose I understand this. Usually people are slow to come out, not groggy, kinda grouchy. I do recall working in recovery, and saying "wake up, wake up" about a million times. Only to have people wake up and puke all over the place.

I was relieved to hear all looked well. Some excess tissue in my uterus. The samples are at a pathology lab, but looked fine. I was also informed that there is little room for error in the abdomen. There just isn't room for extra anything. That excess tissue, could have been causing the "female issues". The cyst probably was the culprit causing the pain. Anyway, that is good to know. Because we were worried, very worried, due to family history. So I felt pretty good Friday. Yesterday, Saturday was rough. I am unsure if it was the narcotics, or the anesthesia, the CO2 they pumped into me, but I spent yesterday with ice on my head, and a bucket by the bed. I had a terrible headache and nausea. The kind of headache, where if you move your eyes, you feel like you will die. I even took 2 imitrix, they did not touch the thing. ick.....I felt better last night.

I have been resting. It seems like the afternoons and evenings were better for me. The sleep I have been getting ahhhhhh. Can I tell you, I had created an island in our bedroom. I had put movies in, and brought a book. I was ready to relax. Heck I couldn't stay awake for the life of me. I would read a page, and would doze off into neverland. I would wake up and start watching a movie, and poof wake up 2 hours later, only to see something entirely different on TV. Crazy crazy. I do not think I have slept so much in my lifetime.

Oh, and I was up and about. I unloaded the wash machine, did a couple loads of wash, I even cooked a bit of dinner. DH did a great job of keeping the kids away from me. They like to hang and paw on me. DH knew I was not in the mood. DH also emptied my puke buckets, brought ice packs, phone, and orange push ups to me. He missed a couple of days work, which we had not figured on. Usually I am hard core. However between the infection, and 2 procedures, and the dehydrating effects of the laxatives, he knew I was not full speed. I owe him one.

So I am feeling better, I am hoping this does the trick for a while. I miss feeling energetic, and running with the collective, I miss yoga...

So for all of the prayers, advice, and well wishes I thank you!!

DH, for all of your help...Thank you-thank you-thank you. I love you.

Thursday, July 27, 2006


I am home.

All went better than everyone anticipated. My uterine waalls were cleaned up.

Tissue looks healthy and pink. My ovaries look good as well. The ovaries have healed. The ovarian cyst rupture, looks like just that.

I have never had anesthesia, NEVER. So between the fog of the anesthesia, the fatigue of surgery, and the drugs, I am good.

So excuse me while I go back to bed and listen to the ompah band that is marching around in my head.

*BTW, If I Were A Carpenter performed by Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash, was a lovely way to fall asleep prior to the surgery.

I'm off....

Ok, I am dressed, nail polish is removed, no jewelry, no make up. Once again I have had to take laxatives last night, and have nothing to eat or drink since midnight last night.

Deep breath. IPOD check, book check.

Family good.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

News item of the day....NOT

The Associated Press

Lance Bass, band member of 'N Sync, says he's gay and in a "very stable" relationship with a reality show star. Bass, who formed 'N Sync with Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez, Joey Fatone and Chris Kirkpatrick, tells People magazine that he didn't earlier disclose his sexuality because he didn't want to affect the group's popularity.

Is this "news? It certainly wasn't a surprise.

Laparoscopy haiku

There is pain waiting
tiny holes punched in my flesh
Will act as windows

A birdie told me....

*Although Tammi doesn't have a "thing" for Beckham, heck I am posting this photo anyway, because any holiday is a good time to put up a photo of Beckham*

Someone is having a birthday July 28th.

My Blog Momma Tammi is celebrating FRIDAY!!!

So in typical Blogger-nerd fashion, I am going to meme her.

Birthday Meme

1. What is your favorite birthday cake?

2. What has been the best gift you have ever received?

3. How did you spend your favorite birthday?

4. Do you make birthday wishes?

5. Has a wish ever come true?

Happy Birthday Tammi. Now go over there and wish her well. That means you!!!

Tuesday, July 25, 2006


So I have made no secret that I have felt under the weather. There were female issues, some pain issues, blah blah ad naseum.

Colonoscopy clear, breath in.......and out.

I must take a moment here to thank whomever developed the "pills" to take instead of the old drink a gallon or two of horrid tasting crap. The pills, (although they are as big as a cell phone) were easy.

Also, the inventor of television. I am not a huge fan of the television, but it has done a great job of entertaining me, and the children. Particulary with the 100 plus degree temperatures, and me on medicine in which I cannot be in the sun. was so nice drifting off to Love and Rockets, and waking to David Bowie after the procedure today.

Only one more Drs. visit this week, and then I should have enough diagnostics to prove I am certifiable, or there is a female I will remain absorbed in well myself. Selfish, worried and preoccupied.

The other take lemons and make lemonade news. "scars with the laperoscopy". I made it this far through my life with one visible scar on my face, and now there will be scars on my marsupial pouch. It will provide a great understandable excuse for never wearing a bikini again.

Oh and to those of you who have had the procedure, and for your insight and warnings, I thank you.

Oh and the prayer thing, keep them coming.....I am sure it is nothing.

Drum Roll Please......

Colonoscopy clear. Done.


Colonoscopy Haiku

Swallowing big pills
For the colonospopy
I am left empty

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Reno 911

New Season starts tonight.....

In Preparation.....

Monday I will spend the day "preparing" for a colonoscopy. Oh, and if that is not fun enough, I get to spend part of the afternoon, at the Vagina whisperer's office, trying to schedule more lab, and a laproscopy.

So, say double prayers, or whatever it is you feel could spin some good Karma, positive energy, healing resonance, whatever it is I am in the need of.


Greg, gets a week or two off of chemo. Send him a note. He might like something to read and some words of encouragement.

P.O. Box 883,
Horn Lake, MS 38637

Saturday, July 22, 2006

I'm gonna get you sucka.....

Move over Mega Blocks...

The charm has worn off..bring on the legos. Yes LEGOS, tiny tiny pieces of lego all over my house.

Dash has mastered almsot every building medium we currently have at the house. We are ready for the LEGOS.

On The Nightstand

From Simon and Schuster
After losing her teaching position at the local university, Mariah Moon will do anything to keep her gifted twelve-year-old daughter, Lindsay, in a prestigious private school -- which means moving in with her mother and grandmother in an apartment above The Owl & Moon Café.

When her mother, Allegra, is diagnosed with leukemia, Mariah rises to the challenge of running the café: mastering her mother's famous fudge and chatting up customers -- including a man who might just reawaken her heart. Meanwhile, Lindsay's controversial entry in a major national science contest creates a minor maelstrom in the cosseted Monterey Bay community. And Allegra, with one last great love affair in her, will revisit a man she loved so many years ago, and disclose the biggest secret of the Moon family: the identity of Mariah's father.

Will the Moon women recognize this as the moment to do away with their family history of dubiously fathered children, and learn to forgive others and themselves in order to move forward? In her poignant new novel, bestselling author Jo-Ann Mapson explores the complexities of love and family with the keen eye and stylistic grace that have made her books perennial favorites.

Product Details
Simon & Schuster, July 2006
Trade Paperback, 368 pages
ISBN-10: 0-7432-6641-2
ISBN-13: 978-0-7432-6641-3

Friday, July 21, 2006

Good Things

The sound of thunder. I am telling you my lawn was about to burn up.

This phonecall


Caller: *static* I have won the $1,000 *static*

Me: *static* hello?

Caller: *static* wooohoooo *click*

(It took a moment, but I determined the call was from Aunt Leggy)

2 of my labs came back as normal.

Orange Sherbet is delicious on a 100 degree plus day.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Sometimes it is ok to be...

Lessons of the week.

Sometimes, it is better to wait instead of anticipate. Sometimes it is better to read a book, than to think of the worst case scenario. Sometimes it is better to wait for answers.

There have been a lot of great life lessons this week.

When I have my one sided conversations with God, I usually let him know if his lessons for the week were easy or hard. This week, well they have been tough.

I always think it is funny, when he re-tests though. There have been a couple of re-tests.
Happy Birthday Dame Diana Rigg AKA Emma Peel

May you have a cheeky birthday luv....

If I were you, I would enjoy myself.


If I Were Emma Peel.....

I would send my evil twin to the Gastroenterologist this afternoon.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Never a size 5 again

...And that is ok.

Army of Mom , put this link up the other day called "Shape of A Mother".

The lady in charge of the site calls herself "zebrabelly".

I thought some of you Mothers, would benefit from perusing the site. Because most of us do not look like Heidi Klum after having babies.

Danke schoen

The news is bad, it is hotter than Georgia asphault, but you MUST READ THIS!! NOW, go read it!!

Oh, and can I say, there isn't a more deserving couple. All I can say is WOW, and I LOVE Wayne Newton.

Too Darn Hot

*thermometer located in the back yard, in the partial shade created by the crepe myrtle, photo taken a 3:00pm*

I'd like to fool with my baby tonight
break ev'ry rule with my baby tonight
I'd like to fool with my baby tonight
break ev'ry rule with my baby tonight
but pillow you'll be my baby tonight
cause it's too darn hot
it's too darn hot

From the show "Kiss Me Kate" (1948)
(Cole Porter)

I imagine, Cole Porter wrote Too Darn Hot on a day like today. Because honestly, it is too darn hot.

*excerpt from personal diary* "100 plus temperatures, do not mix well with a toddler who consumed a box of jello. The house feels uber small"

Seeing Red Or the mystery of the red tounge solved.

*Photo* Dash at the kitchen table this morning, playing with a garlic press and play doh.

I woke this morning to find my four year old Dash's tounge red. A good Mother would have had a normal proces like illness, etc. Not me, I immediately started looking for what he could have consumed that would turn his tounge red. I then note his finger tips are also red.

It seems as though Child Protective Services ought to come investigate me. Because Dash was so starved, he had eaten a box of dry strawberry jello. Damn. Ick.

Now it was while Pink Ninja and I were still sleeping. Also gone...the rest of "my" double chocolate milano cookies my Mother in law had sent me in my birthday spa package.

So I am sitting here this morning, wondering if I should start a coffee IV on myself. I am sure the red dye and sugar will cause some sort of olympic track speed records.

Looks like I better put on my tennis shoes folks.

*note* I fed my family a well rounded and nutritious meal last evening.

*also note* my niece in Nebraska, did this same thing just last week.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

The Worlds Fastest Indian

Ok, so we didn't watch Fargo, or Dr. Zhivago. Thanks to air conditioning we watched.... The Worlds Fastest Indian.

A movie based on the life of Burt Munro, and his dream of setting the land speed record for streamlined motorcycles under 1000cc.

WOW. A must see.

I would reccomend this as a family movie. There are a couple of sexual references, one brief drug reference. Oh and there is a transvestite, but honestly a family movie.


The old locked in the "walk- in freezer " sitcom plot....

Does anyone recall sitcom episodes where someone is locked in a walk in freezer overnight?

I seem to recall it happening in Happy Days, or Brady Bunch. Or was it Three's Company. Maybe, Laverne and Shirley.

For some reason I cannot make a disconnect from one show to another. Did they all have stuck in the walk in freezer episodes?

or perhaps...


Ice... Ice..... Baby

Tonight I propose "Dr. Zhivago"....

A new low

Just when I thought cat blogging was bad, it is in the 100's here for the 4th day in a row.

"Today's high, is expected to reach 103 degrees, with the heat index, it will feel like 106"

We are in the house, and we are not leaving. I have all blinds closed. The wind is 4 mph, which is slower than I walk, so it offers no relief. Balmy. The kind of heat and humidty, that makes it hard for even mosquitos to fly freely. It makes all creatures slow moving. Mostly me. The poor air conditioner running non stop. It is, beginning to sound like a cash register. Every time I heard it kick on through the night, I swear I heard money jumping into envelopes.

These are the days, that lead me to think, we were nuts to move here. Nuts. These are the days I seriously consider Dear Husbands proposal that we retire off grid in the mountains somewhere in Wyoming, or Montana. Snow....cold. Ahhhhh.....

Then I could piss and moan about scooping snow, and being trapped indoors for months at a time with toddlers, heating bills.

In all honesty I think sweaters, and nights by the fire are much more romantic, then sweaty, stinky, grouchy, overheated people.

Then again ask me in December...

Monday, July 17, 2006

If you are HOT watch this

I rented this 2 nights ago. We had never heard of the movie. However, can I tell you. It is a funny movie, and with the 100 degree temperatures, ahhh. Holly Hunter is hilarious.

The War Tapes

I was over at Soldier's Angels New York this morning, and found this great list of where the War Tapes will be showing.

ARLINGTON, MA (Capitol Theatre)
ARLINGTON, VA (AMC Loews Shirlington 7)
BERKLEY, CA (Landmark Shattuck Cinemas
CAMBRIDGE, MA (Kendall Square Cinema)
CHICAGO, IL (The Music Box Theatre)
CONCORD, NH (Regal (Hoyts) Concord 10)
HUNTINGTON, NY (Cinema Arts Centre)
KEENE, NH (Colonial Theatre)
MANCHESTER, NH (Regal Cinemas 9)
SAN FRANCISCO, CA (The Castro Theatre)
SAN FRANCISCO, CA (Balboa Theater)
SAN JOSE, CA (Camera 12)
SAN RAFAEL, CA (Rafael Film Center)
WASHINGTON, DC (E Street Cinema)
WILKES-BARRE, PA (R/C Wilkes-Barre Movies 14)
WILTON, NH (Town Hall Cinema)
WEST NEWTON, MA (West Newton Cinema)


07/21 – NORTHAMPTON, MA (Academy of Music Theatre)
07/28 – BALTIMORE, MD (The Charles Theatre)
07/28 – KILLEEN, TX (Killeen Hollywood Stadium 14)
07/28 – PITTSFIELD, MA (Little Cinema at The Berkshire Museum)
07/28 – SACRAMENTO, CA (The Crest Theatre)
07/28 – SANTA ROSA, CA (Rialto Cinemas Lakeside)
08/03 – LAKE WORTH, FL (Stage West)
08/04 – BUFFALO, NY (Market Arcade Film & Arts Centre)
08/04 – FT. LAUDERDALE, FL (Cinema Paradiso)
08/04 – LINCOLN, NE (Mary Riepma Ross Media Arts Center)
08/04 – NASHVILLE, TN (Belcourt Theatre)
08/04 – WILMINGTON, DE (Theatre N at Nemours)
08/07 – ALBUQUERQUE, NM (Guild Cinema)
08/11 – BURLINGTON, VT (The Roxy)
08/11 – CLEVLAND, OH (Cedar Lee Theatre)
08/11 – COLUMBUS, OH (The Drexel Gateway Theater)
08/11 – PITTSBURGH, PA (Regent Square Theater)
08/11 – STAMFORD, CT (Avon Theatre)
08/11 – TUCSON, AZ (The Loft Cinema)
08/18 – COLUMBUS, GA (Carmike 15)
08/18 – DALLAS, TX (Landmark Magnolia)
08/18 – FAYETTEVILLE, NC (Carmike Market Fair 15)
08/18 – FT. BENNING, GA (Carmike Wynnsong 10)
08/18 – HARTFORD, CT (Real Art Ways)
08/18 – ITHICA, NY (Fall Creek Pictures)
08/18 – JACKSONVILLE, NC (Carmike 16)
08/25 – BETHLEHEM, NH (The Colonial Theatre)
08/25 – COLORODO SPRINGS, CO (Carmike 10)
08/25 – LAWTON, OK (Carmike 8)
08/25 – PHILADELPHIA, PA (Ritz Five)
08/25 – VORHEES, NJ (Ritz Sixteen)
08/27 – OJAI, CA (Playhouse Theatre)
08/27 – SAN FRANCISCO, CA (Red Vic Movie House)
09/01 – ATLANTA, GA (Landmark Midtown Art Cinema)
09/01 – DENVER, CO (Starz FilmCenter)
09/01 – MADISON, WI (Orpheum Theatre)
09/01 – PORTLAND, ME (The Movies on Exchange)
09/05 – COLUMBIA, MO (Ragtag Cinema)
09/06 – SPRINGFIELD, MO (The Moxie Cinema)
09/08 – AUSTIN, TX (Landmark Dobie Cinemas)
09/08 – HOUSTON, TX (Landmark River Oaks Theatre)
09/15 – MINNEAPOLIS, MN (Landmark Lagoon Cinemas)
09/15 – ROCHESTER, NY (The Little Theatre)
09/22 – DETROIT, MI (Detroit Institute of Art)
09/22 – FLINT, MI (National Amusements Cinema 10)
09/23 – NOTRE DAME, IN (The Michael Browning Family Cinema)
09/29 – PORTLAND, OR (Hollywood Theatre)
10/13 – W. LOS ANGELES, CA (Landmark Nuart)
10/20 – BRUNSWICK, ME (Eveningstar Cinema)
10/20 – SEATTLE, WA (Landmark Varsity Theatre)
11/20 – SANTA BARBARA, CA (UCSB Campbell Hall)

Damn, I must push a little harder to get this movie here. Everyone that has seen it, has left impressed. Most people I know are right leaning, but do offer that this film is apolitical. They left with a feeling that it is a human story, and not a political one.

I met Deb Scranton at the mil-blogging conference. We talked briefly.

I did get to meet Specialist Moriarty. We had a drink, and he told me a bit about his wife, and her experiance back home. She too got to film her life.

From The War Tapes site, there is this from Mike.

On September 11th 2001 I was a changed man. I packed a bag and took a bus from Concord NH a week later to NYC. I had a pass and witnessed with my own 2 eyes the still burning nightmare and the smell of horror. I felt the 6 inch deep silt with my hands and read all the photo copies littered all over the place and posted on anything that was standing of missing loved ones.

This I will NOT EVER forget. I appreciate my parents. I appreciate my health. I appreciate what I do have.
I appreciate every single soldier who has done what I'm about to do. I hope to relieve a soldier who can go home and enjoy life with his wife and children. Whoever he will be, he is my hero.

I will write again soon,

Mike Moriarty

My t-shirt babe...

Ok, someone called my t-shirt babe a chickenhawk, and a pottymouth.
Thems is "fightin" words round these parts. (We all know who the real potty mouth is.)

Uncle Jimbo's response is classic.

Looks like fight club, and my money is on Jimbo.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Letter from Pink Ninja training Camp #802

*the following is a written account of events explained by Pink Nijna*

Readers of Moms blog,

This is a letter of rebuttal I suppose.

"Barrel of Monkey"? I am insulted.

Look at the photo again.

The photo was taken last weekend here at Casa De Dust. Mom, thought "washing Dads vehicle" sounded like a "great and fun cooling activity". (*Note: I am in the rake leaf barrel*)

Yeah, I am not buying into it. Washing vehicle = Fun. Ha! Who does this woman think she is fooling? Well, she fooled Dash.

He loves "washing vehicles". Look at him, he was loving it.

Ick. Not me, what is sooo fun about that, particularly when no money exchanged hands. (*note to self, must contact department of labor, re: violation of child labor laws*)

Go ahead Mom, take photos, and call me a barrel of monkey, but you and Dash spent 3 hours washing the vehicle....And now I have proof.

Who's laughing now?

Pink Ninja

P.S: I will not contact department of labor, if a doll house, and new clickety shoes exchange hands . You have until August 1st.

Barrel of monkey


Some Days are just this fun....

*watching Charlie and Lola, is like watching the collective, sans violence*

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Ode to the blue dress.....

Yeah, the blue dress, was the dress I had chosen. I thought it would look nice on my summer skin, and it was not clingy. However, the change of command dinner was this evening. Due to Dear Husbands work schedule, we do not have to attend event. (Jumping up and down!!!)

The good news is I do not have to pay $90, for a mediocre peice of chicken, or smile widely all night.

The bad news is, it is a rare occassion I get to look :foxy". Dear Husband is usually treated to blue jeans and a t-shirt, and by the time he sees me at 6pm or so, I have finger prints on me.

The good news is, we will be able to take the baby sitter, and COC dinner money, and hit the town when I am feeling up to it.....and we will not be on parade, we will get to talk to one another across the table!

Now, I gotta figure out what to wear on this date...oh and figure out WHEN we can see one another.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Sticky is as sticky does...

I woke this morning to find my tile floor in the kitchen smattered with orange juice. Dash, hates orange juice. So, I look over at Pink ninja. It seems as though in her 2 1/2 year old brilliance, that there is no way better to celebrate her love of orange juice then to pour it over her own head.

AWTM: "What is all over your head?"

Pink Ninja: "Nubbing"

AWTM: "Why did you pour orange juice all over your head?"

Pink Ninja: *non descript whine*

AWTM: "You are going to need a shower."

Pink Ninja: "NOOOO!!"

AWTM: "A bath?"

Pink Niinja: "NOOOOOOO!"

AWTM: "You can take your pirate ship"

PinkNinja: "o'tay"

*OK, and now here is an incident later in the day, of equal grossness factor*

Pink Ninja: "I love you...put all of these bawaettes in my hawah"

AWTM: "OK, come over here."

Pink Ninja: *SMILING coyly*

AWTM: "these barrettes, are all wet, did you lick them?"

Pink Ninja: "yes."

How I will spend the day

My mopping was done by 9:30am. I have the usual laundy to do. There always seems to be laundry. It is quiet today, and the kids are quiet. Ssshhhh...

However, thanks to a special friend and blogger I can look at this while folding clothes.

I can prop my feet up and read this! So far so funny, a book written by a blogger. Thank you for making me laugh.

Oh, and thanks to another blogger, I have a little shopping to to do!! Exactly what the Dr. ordered!

Well I D-eclair

Now that is funny folks, that is funny.

So Dash had picked "mini chocolate eclairs" for my birthday dessert.

We all made them....Deliciousness. Even if I made the eclairs into cream puffs, because I did not want to use a pastry bag.

They were scrumptious. Recipe to come soon.

My first batch of cream puffs were undercooked, they went to the garbage. However the rest were DIVINE.

*the plate I used, was my Grandmothers milk glass platter. It was nice to have an occasion to use such a platter.

Showered ...

I woke this morning, thankful. I have had a great year. I have made a lot of good friends, and I have family that loves me. Strange how an online diary, has introduced me to such great individuals.

I recieved wonderful gifts, phonecalls, notes, e-mails......

My birthday was very special this year.

Thanks to my Mother-in-Law, I spent the night at the Casa De Dust all inclusive spa....
*no photos of me in the tub*
~new fluffy white bath sheets, a relaxing piano cd, candles, bubble bath, double chocolate milano cookies, a heartfelt note on a card that said "To MY Daughter"....and more goodies. Even things for "the collective" to keep them occupied.

I rarely speak of my Mother in law, but she has one of the biggest hearts I have seen. Despite it being broken a time or two, she has managed to pick up the pieces and put them back together making it bigger than before. (Now darling, of you can figure out how to do that with a 20$ we are in business! )

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

If I Were Emma Peel

I would be tickled pink, that it was my Birthday.

Like a visit to the gynolcologist is not humiliating enough, or Things you do not want to hear on the day before turning 36.

*The following contains language not suitable for younger readers*

Fade In: 106 degree, balmy day in the midsouth. A Mother and her two small children enter the waiting area of a second floor gynocological center. The children, are running loose, trying to get away with climbing on furniture. The Mom opens her library book.

Pregnant woman to her left: (smiling brightly) "You, look GREAT pregnant."

Mother of Two: (expressionless) "I am not pregnant."

Pregnant woman to her left: "Oh, well, I thought, since you (stammerring and blushing) were uh here, and uh, oh your kids are adorable."

Mother of Two: (In her head) Fuck you bi-och.

Birthday prayer answered...

Ok I am back from the vagina whisperer, and McDonald's Playplace.

The polyps, are simply that...benign polyps EXHALE. They also could have been the culprit of some of the bleeding I was having.

The cyst, was simply a cyst.

Some of the lab is back. All results are in Normal limits. More lab was taken today.

I have a consult with a gastroentrologist on the 21st, and then a colonoscopy.

After that I am having an exploratory laparoscopy done, to rule out endometrial problems, uterine problems and the like.

We have a plan, and it makes sense. I like my Dr.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

If I Were Emma Peel.....

I would show up at the vagina whisperer's office "like this" in the morning.

The doorbell rang and left me smiling......

I dread the doorbell after 6pm. It is usually some fresh faced school kid trying to squeeze yet another dime from the Casa De Dust.

Not tonight, it was the UPS guy with this

drum roll.....

Paula Deen & Friends: Living It Up, Southern Style
by Paula Deen with Martha Nesbit
Simon & Schuster, 2005

ISBN: 0-7432-6722-2

Hooray, an early gift, and what a lovely cookbook it is. Dash and I fought over it. I gave in, and let him read it, while I did dinner dishes. I think he looked through it for 30 minutes.

AWTM: "So are you finding any good recipes?"

Dash: "I think I have found dessert, mini chocolate eclairs"

AWTM: (smiling at DH) "Do we have the ingredients?"

Dash: "3 cups whole milk, flour, eggs, and butter...Do we have 3 cups of whole milk?"

AWTM: "I think we do, that will be a great project for tomorrow."

I am thrilled with this gift. Can I tell you, I have been skimming through it all night. I can hear Paula reading each recipe too. I am going to take it to the bath tonight, it is that good.

It is filled with plenty of menu ideas for entertaining. Even food for vacations, and menus for a slumber party! Paula also makes room for short cuts, and insists on getting out of the kitchen ASAP so the cook can enjoy her guests.

So guess what AWTM, is having for her birthday cake?

A mound of mini chocolate eclairs. I think it is exactly what I need. Oh and if they turn out, I think I would love chocolate eclairs every year for my birthday.

I also was thrilled to see Dash looking through this cookbook so intrigued by recipes.

Thank You Uncle Rico, Aunt Leggy, and Cousin Curl, for sending a gift that transported me from being fearful of tomorrow, to planning meals for the next few months.

I have a junk drawer full of paperclips...

and no forsight, or thought. Crap.

I am sure some of you have heard the story of the blogger who has bartered his way to home ownership using a paperclip as the starter.

excerpt from his blog here..

My name is Kyle MacDonald and I traded one red paperclip for a house. I started with one red paperclip on July 12 2005 and 14 trades later, on July 12, 2006 I will trade with the Town of Kipling Saskatchewan for a house located at 503 Main Street. Feel free to give me a shout - all my contact info is here. Click on pictures below to read about each trade.

like I said I have a drawer full of stuff you might want. There are some drawer locks, rubber bands, tacks. envelopes, pens..



going once...

going twice....

One of the 6 CD's in the car

Laurie Berkner

What is playing in the truwk....

well the CD anyway. In fact it played almost the entire 10 hour drive to and from Nebraska. Not bad really. Not nearly as irritating as one would think. Plus "The Collective" now take requests.

I need to get the video, looks like quite a workout.....for all of us.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Begin the Benign

And now when I hear people curse the chance that was wasted,
I know but too well what they mean;
So don't let them begin the beguine
~Cole Porter

I turn 36 on Thursday. 36.

I am also enough of a narcissist to think that I should feel better this week. After all it is MY birthday week. I should feel good. However, I do not. The Drs. Are unsure what is going on, I still have lab pending, and more Drs. And specialists to go to. It has been such a mind screw, that I am not sure if I am coming or going.

I am also feeling a bit betrayed by my body, and mind. Because I really have taken excellent care of myself this year. I made my health a priority. I meditate, I exercise, I believe in good nutrition. I was feeling better than I ever have.

So tonight I sit here, not feeling my usual 20-something self. My body feels like someone else's.

There is also Dear Husbands job, is he going away to guard the border, is he staying here, is he going to have additional job duties? Yeah, that too is up in the air, and seems to change minute by minute.

So tonight is the type of night I will lie in my bed, and try and recall the best moments of the day. The moment when Dash told me I was "the prettiest mom in the World", or when Pink Ninja nuzzled to my neck making her sweet little puppy noises.
I will recall that day I walked into my Dear Husbands office, and he stopped everything and smiled perfectly, and I felt beautiful.

I will also have flickers of the illness I have witnessed through the years as a hospice nurse. Memories of family illnesses, and lost hair, and nausea, and the fear that comes with that. My Uncles pancreatic cancer, my Aunts breast cancer, my Mothers colon cancer. The Drs. That diagnosed wrong....

I will recall being in nursing school, and working oncology at Christmas. That Mother who was 35, with 2 children, making plans for the future of her children, because she had received news she might make it to New Years.

These flickers, are not merely my memories snapshots. I recall voices, and phonecalls, Drs. visits, the smell of bleach off of my own uniform, a dehydrated hand holding on to mine, tissues dampened with tears, I can even hear the sound of that Mother singing lullabyes to her grown daughter as she was dying.

I will lie in bed tonight, and count my BLESSINGS. I will say my prayers, and I will think of those I have seen fade away, only to shine brilliantly elsewhere.

I will also rethink writing this post at all, because in a couple of weeks I will hear that all is well, it was simply an ovarian cyst, and the polyps are benign, and all is well. I will then feel embarrassed to have worried so much, and caused worry in others, and I will feel guilty because my faith is not what it used to be.

For Better or for Wurst.....

*Photo of the Pierce meat locker in Nebraska. A town where I am related to almost everyone, and know a handful of them.

Pierce Lockers is open weekdays from 7 am to 5 pm and 8 am til noon on Saturdays. 402-329-4365.

German Mettwurst
A Traditional German Favorite - very lean fresh pork mettwurst (made with certified pork) that spreads real nice on a good hearty rye bread. Serve with a glass of german beer and a good pickle. We offer our Authentic German Mettwurst in 3 styles: Fresh (Raw), Smoked, and Fully Cooked Garlic Mettwurst.

Dinner was delicious. The mettwurst was rich.

The pride of the Pierce meat locker is "Wragge dogs". A delicious, hot dog/sausage, when eaten off the grill and with mustard are simply the best dogs I have eaten.

You are also able to get ring bologna, mettwurst, liver sausage, blood sausage, summer sausage, breakfast sausage.

Unfortunatly, I do not have access the family recipes. I do however have my Aunt Verlyns recipe for head cheese. Anyone interested?

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Like Water for Chocolate?

*Please do not read after eating*
Just another reason for me to enjoy the great state of Arkansas.

Arkansas mayor released on bond after sex-for-water charge
May 2006
U.S. Water News Online

WALDRON, Ark. -- An affidavit supporting charges against Waldron's mayor -- accused of soliciting two women for sex after they fell behind on their water bills -- says the two women wore recording devices during encounters with the mayor.

Mayor Troy Anderson, 72, was released on a signature bond in an appearance before Judge Donald Goodner, who said Anderson was not a flight risk, according to the Scott County Circuit Clerk's Office. Goodner set an arraignment for July 6.

He is charged with two felony counts of abuse of public trust and four misdemeanor counts of patronizing a prostitute.

An affidavit supporting the charges says that, in January, a woman who said she had refused Anderson's requests for sex went to the mayor for help in getting her granddaughter out of state Department of Health and Human Services custody. The mayor told the woman he might be able to help, and that she should meet him at an apartment, the affidavit said.

The woman wore a recording device when she met Anderson at the apartment, and Anderson offered her $100 for sex, the affidavit said. She said the mayor grabbed her and exposed himself.

Another woman told investigators that she'd been having sex with Anderson for money for the past eight to 10 years. She said Anderson paid her $25 per encounter and that he allowed her to change the name on her overdue water bill, which kept her water turned on, the affidavit said.

The mayor also gave the woman $60 to pay a late water deposit in exchange for sex, the affidavit said. The woman's bill was $617 overdue, the affidavit said.

In February, the second woman wore a recording device when Anderson picked her up for a sexual encounter that netted her $20, authorities said.

The Antique Rode Show

Today is That One Guys Birthday. Now, I have met That One Guy on a few occassions. He has played air hockey with Dash, he has even eaten meatloaf with Dear Husband and I. He is like a Brother. A Brother I can never find. It seems as if he has take his one man show on the road. A sort of Jack Keruac, trying to find ones self, mid life crises year of sorts. If the guy had a dollar for every blogger he has met, he could buy a case of REALLY good beer.

When I first met That One Guy, I was a little nervous, I mean he is a biker, and you know what they say about bikers.

*Photographic Evidence that That One Guy really has a bike*

The second time I met That One Guy, he asked if it was ok to bring "company", and while I anticipated something off of the pages of Easy Riders, he brought Marge with him.

*That One Guys "lady friend" Marge (don't let the bike frighten you, she was a doll and even brought potato salad, and pie)

So, wherever you are, be safe. Tell Marge "hey", and I will leave the light on.

Saturday, July 08, 2006


It is Saturday morning. Yolattes, was awfull this morning. I think I over did it yesterday.

Upon arriving home, "The collective" requested pancakes, blueberry pancakes. The dishes are in the wash.

When I woke this morning, I listened to the local morning news. The called 75% low humidity this morning. Ick.

Pink Ninja is on antibiotics for an ear infection. Her bilateral tubes that were placed in her ears while DH was in Iraq are working themselves out. She has to go back to the ENT in 3 weeks.

I managed to get my hair did 2 days ago. I decided to go with the chesnut again. I did get bangs though. My hairdresser looks great pregnant. Must be a boy.

"The collective" had a new babysitter. She was nice, the children liked her. Dash thought she was beautiful. The shampoo girl has also offerred her services as a babysitter. Yeah, I am not sure if you can have too many baby sitters.

Dear Husband returned last night, from scoping out logistics, and acting as a liason of sorts. He is exhausted, and has dark circles under his eyes. The good news is, he will not be permanently at the border. It looks like he will be able to manage his side of this primarily from here. Hopefully with very few visits away. Although I will not hold my breath.

Dash, is good. He is hanging upside down off of the couch.

Friday, July 07, 2006


Well, since my dress was damaged by the United States Postal Service, I need a new dress. So, I have narrowed my search.

I am not wearing black, I refuse to. The week has been hard on me, very hard. Let me add here that I will also be turning a year older next week. I could use a pick me up. The dress is for evening, and it is for a change of command ceremony.
I am not going to tell you which I prefer. But I am leaning towards one of them.

If I Were Emma Peel.....

I would have spent the afternoon with the wind blowing through my hair, instead of wrestling at the ENT.

Cage Fighter

Pink Ninja and Dash have summer colds.

This has led to Pink Ninja complaining of left ear pain. So yesterday amidst the rash of appointments. I had to take her to the pediatricain.

They tried to irrigate her left ear. (She has small eustachian tubes, and a cerumen problem).

Prior to irrigating her ear, they weighed Pink Ninja. "29" pounds, at 2 1/2. She is very spider like, all legs and arms.

I had the lovely duty of holding her while they irrigated her ear.

She is a great fighter. I would put my money on her in any fight.

Sha manged to wiggle herself out of all of my holds, while pinching the nurse that was irrigating her ear. She was tricky and sneaky. The crocodile tears, and sorrowful crying also played a part in the Nurse and Dr. giving up. We have to go to the ENT today.

The staff was left feeling so guilty, they apologized endlessly to PinkNinja. I am telling you, this little one can work people.

YOu have been warned.


I woke this morning, feeling better. Ahh. It is amazing how a cyst on an ovary, such a "tiny" and powerful organ can make one so sick.

I woke this morning amazed at how much better I felt. I was sicker than I had thought.

Suprise to some of you, nurses make horrid patients.

Seems as if when I am ill, I retreat, get quiet and want to be left alone. (Which is nearly impossible).

Thank you for all of your thoughts, prayers and the like, and do not worry I am following up on all things. I have enough paperwork and appointments, to make one insane. I am doing my research.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Don't be sad, cause 2 out of three ain't bad......

Ok so the cervical polyps noted yesterday, were removed yesterday. This mornings sonogram showed, no evidence of uterine fibroids, fluid behind right ovary, consistant with an ovarian cyst rupture. ("probably ruptured in the last 24 hours")

So it looks like 2 out of the 3 things took care of themselves. Although I will give gratitude to all of those that said an extra prayer last night....Thank You.

I am plain old tired now. Long day, and I will go into that later. Do I feel better? A little the sharp pain, and cramping are gone. However after drinking close to 64 oz of water this morning, ask me tonight.


even after taking some melatonin, and drinking chamomile.

thinking about the pelvic sonogram in the morning, also thinking about the fact that lab, and test results, will take FOREVER.

*must buy a case of chamomile tea*

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Spilt Milk

So, in case you haven't read, today not so good here at Casa De Dust. The day could have been worse, and I will count my blessings of a family, and my home. But the day has been hard. However, I was strolling through it like a champ, unitl I was notified via mail, that my dress I need next weekend was damaged in the mail. The dress is sold out and unavailable until August 11.

(This is the second time I have ordered this damn dress in a year and half)

Anyway, as horrid as the day was, the dress thing was the thing, that almost ALMOST made me cry.

I said ALMOST...

I have returned from the Vagina whisperer,

or whatever you want to call her.

Let me start his by saying, if I never have to take my children with me to the gynocologist, I will be happy.

The children would not stay away from the foot of the table, and The Vagina Whisperer really did try to protect my "privacy", but really. I kept seeing there heads poke up and around at me. Disturbing really. Probably more for them than I. That is another story, and I am sure I will be in therapy with one or the other in 15 years for it. Any bribe, or candy, or reward was no where as interesting as a 500 watt light, and medical instruments, and "the show"....Yeah I know.

So the kids got a show, made comments. Yes, they made comments. Oh, and I think I will keep those to myself. The four laughs I would get, are not worth, the centimeter of my dignity that is left.

I tried to be "cool" and educate them, about vaginas, womens health, and the need for a yearly exam.

The results of the pelvic exam, well, it looks like I am an issue with either a uterine fibroid or ovarian cysyt. I do have an appointment with a radiology office in the monrning to determine exactly what the problem is. I also had 2 cervical polyps removed (benign in appearence, and yes they are being sent to the path lab). They also have me seeing a gastroenterologist within the next couple of weeks, for a colonscopy. (Based on family history, etc.)

One step at a time. I assure you nothing to worry about.

So guess what folks....I am here all week, try the veal.

I will not be posting photos of the colonscopy.

All is well, the "collective", will tell you I am normal.

I am off to see the Wizard...

Actually it is not time yet. I do have my gynocologial visit today at 10:10am. Lovely. "The collective" in tow.

I need to gas up the truck before heading out, and need to mail a package to Dear Mother in Law. (sorry it is late)There isn't much in the darn thing anyway, but there are photos of the kids, and lots of pictures they have colored, especially for you.

DH, is headed south via airplane today to do some preparation for "border duty". The news on this gets messier and jumbled by the day. However, the way it currently stands, DH will not have to go full time. It sounds like he will be in a sort of liason position. Normally, I would cheer this, however he will still have his regular job duties in addition to this. The fact the he will be home is great. However, I have not discounted the possibilities, and it is not over until it is over.

So wish me luck. I have no idea what I will find out today.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006


Pink and Dash, waiting for the parade to begin. Both came out with at least 3 pounds of candy.

This year they had a remote controlled fire engine driven by a stuffed dalmation. The darn thing had the capacity to squirt people. When Dash learned of this, he ran to the woods, only to come back announcing "I have defeated that engine" .

*they only ate 3 pieces per child and forgot all about it. I stole a sucker. *

Fourth of July

It occurred to me this morning while DH was making cheese omelettes, that this is a first for us. This is the first Independence Day we have all been together. Wow.

We have the luxury of one anothers company this year.

No big plans.

Both Pink Ninja and Dash have summer colds, which mainly consist of runny noses and tired little bodies, which has made them a bit "cranky".

We managed a trip to the park this morning, and it was hotter then Hades, air filled with dragonflies, and a symphony of catydids, cicadas, locusts, a frog or two, and a woodpecker to keep us company. Heat, humidit, and no breeze. Oh, I take that back, there was a 30 second breeze, that caused DH and I to sighhhh and smile, and then it was gone.

We did stop at a striped tent to pick up a small assortment of fireworks for later tonight.

A trip to the local video store (99 cent kids movies all summer) after "the collective" complained, that "it is too hot to have fun at this park."

So now the sleeping bags are in a line and Home on The Range is playing.

The town parade starts at 4:00pm sharp.

It has been a quiet day here, and I am glad we are together.

Monday, July 03, 2006

The Great Toddler Car Wash........

*well worth 2 hours of quiet...

At The Car Wash

Headed out to wash "the truwk". It is already hawt as Hades here, and "The Collective" need something to entertain them, other than chasing, and beating the crap out of one another.

Pictures to follow, unless of course my Camera gets damaged.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Icing on the Cake

Well, with the possibility of DH going, I thought I might take up watching soccer. Just so I could watch Beckham.

To ensure my week finished with a bang.

Beckham up and quits as his teams captain.

Men all over the planet are quoted as saying " I told you he was a pussy!"

Women all over the planet are rolling they're eyes, and crying on pillows.


At Casa De Dust.

We are on some sort of red alert here at the house. Apparently the U.S. Goverment thinks that illegals from Mexico (who have been slowly leaking in this country for hundreds of years) are a problem, TODAY Yes you have heard it right.

This is the reason for the shit storm here at Casa De Dust in the recent days.

Tuesday, we get word, that The Arkansas National Guard "might" be on border duty.

Tuesday night, we hear on the LOCAL NEWS Arkansas National Guard "will" have border duty.

So, we got more information from the talking heads on the local news than anywhere else.

Currently it stands that DH could possibly be gone for 3-6 months. We have no idea.

Here is the bonus, he has to start this duty almost immediately.

It seems ironic to me, that I will probably end up having to hire "someone from a certain Country to help with things like lawnwork."


Looks like we here at Casa De Dust are on lockdown for the next 6 months. So, if you have HBO, could you tape Deadwood for me, could someone suggest a good book or two. I will not be going anywhere, as I will be single parenting again.

Yeah, I know he is in the National Guard, and I know I am lucky he is not headed to Iraq again, at least for now.

I was not prepared for this little curve ball at all.

I like to ALWAYS be prepared. I am cool as a cucumber.

This little surprise pissed me off.

Too Much Information AGAIN.....

Uterus, Ovaries, Menstruation...

Yeah that means you, if you do not want to read about any of this go now.

Yeah now.

Go away.

*I am pre-empting this with a note that says I am calling my gynocologist Wednesday morning*

One of my biggest female resources, my Mother-- is gone, and with each day that passes, I am finding myslef sort of "lost". My Mother-in-law, seems to empathize with my current state, and recalls her peri-menapause, and subsequent menapause. She says she can recall these symptoms.

I will be turning 36 on the 13th. This is young. This is not old. However I must say this.

I think I have struck the beginnings of perimenapause, or premenapause.

I also think it started in December. I have been trying to "ignore" it. But frankly this last period, well it about killed me.

My Mother sufferred long and hard with menapause, at least I think she did. At the time my Sister and I thought she was insane. Looking back with my current state, I think it may have been early menapause. I also come from a family where fibroid tumors, endometriosis, and female problems run the continuum from bad to worse.

It does seem odd to me, that I am having 2 periods a month, some months, feelings of anxiety (which is not the norm). Waking at night, so hot and so naseated I feel like I am going to vomit. Achey joints, mood swings.

Crap, 36, and perimenapause.

I had an appointment this past month with my gynocologist, and missed it, dues to absentmindedness(yet another symptom). So I know, I need to make another appointment.

However I really want to know, if anyone around my age, or anyone older can relate. Because I am starting to feel like a nut bucket.

36, and perimenapause, for Lands sake.


I am off to "Mega Walmart" for supplies, and I am in a foul mood. This could be very interesting.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Mosh pit

So Tesco over at 100 records does it again. The Clash. Fantastic, now if I could find something to wear I might turn the laundry room into a pit.

Question of the day...

Is it still a good ole fashioned dog and pony show when everyones head is up they're ass?

*once again more on all of the photo related cryptic nonsense, when I have any clue as to what is going on.