Wednesday, December 07, 2005

More Christmas folklore that could be useful

My brother had a beautiful Icelandic fiancee for 7 years. The relationship ended years ago, however I seem to recall a few of the stories Arnbjorg told me.
Just when I think I cornered the market on great Christmas threats, I recall Arnbjorg and the very fantastical folklore of Iceland.

*note of warning* I do believe this is the same country that has hired a man at the Ministry of Transportation whose job is to make sure road construction doesn't upset the elves, or displace them if you will. No elf refugee problem is needed in Iceland. They are very serious about their elves.

So I was a bit concerned that I shared with the general public my scaring my children to death with coal, and Santa Claus. Perhaps my methods seem harsh, I might have scarred my poor toddlers for life. However I recall the stories from Arnbjorg...And decide my Santa threats are wussy at best.

The Icelandic people have gone above and beyond this. So for those of you that might need a few ideas to get your children to behave...I would certainly adopt this particular culture as your own, for the month of December.

There is "Gryla", the Mother of the 13 Christmas elves, Gryla is not a nice "Mother Christmas". She likes to cook up naughty children and eat them, bones and all. "Gryla" is also married to "Leppaludi". This charming couple own a large black cat as well. This larger than human cat is called Christmas cat. He also eats children who do not get new clothes for Christmas. Not getting new clothing is proof that you were sooooo naughty, you deserve nothing except to be eaten. Old clothes are the only tip this large black cat needs. To think a new sweater, or even socks are powerful enough to save you from this horrid creature.

We move to the 13 Christmas elves, spawned by "Gryla", and "Leppaludi", the most accepted anmes are listed below. However I do remember Arnbrjorg telling me there was a specific elf that was named spoonlicker...

The 13 elves are as follows...

Stekkjarstaur - Gimpy
Giljagaur - Gully Imp
Stúfur - Itty Bitty
Þvörusleikir - Pot Scraper Licker
Pottasleikir - Pot Licker
Askasleikir - Bowl Licker
Hurðaskellir - Door Slammer
Skyrgámur - Skyr Gobbler (Skyr, an Icelandic yoghurt-type)
Bjúgnakrækir - Sausage Snatcher
Gluggagægir - Window Peeper
Gáttaþefur - Doorway Sniffer
Ketkrókur - Meat Hooker
Kertasníkir - Candle Beggar

Maybe I should start using some of these on the children. I am pretty sure they might behave better. Threatening the children with a visit from an elf that slams doors or licks pots....may not work. The doorway sniffer, almost laughable--to even children, but the old lady that will boil and eat them or a large black cat that loves the taste of children on old clothes ...just may be the ticket to a peaceful Holiday here at Casa De Dust.

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