Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Tommorow is my 14th wedding anniversary

I am trying to figure out how to post a photo for tommorow. I wish I could post a photo of every smile, and every blessing.

I wake up every morning and Thank God before I put my feet on the floor. I know I am blessed.

When my Mother was sick with her colon cancer and her metastatic brain tumors my husband was my safe place and my rock. If the phone rang at 2:30 in the morning, he would draw me a bath and pack my bags, load the truck and proceed to drive the 12 hours to get me there. He did it with grace and chivalry. He would then turn around and make the return drive without me. Only to have another 12-15 hour day at work.

I ended up quitting my job and temporarily relocating to Nebraska to care for her. Even though we were not sure we could afford it. He kept telling me....."Do what you can live with in 10 years"......"If that means you need to take care of your Mom, then thats what you do." My Mother was young 57, and wanted to die at home. He allowed it even though he knew he would have to pick up the peices of me, and help me put them back together. He was the one who had to listen to my crying, and my exhaustion......and my dread. He was the one that knew it was my way of forgiving her and me. My Mom was not always a great Mom to me.

I did take care of my Mother, I had to. Dear Husband knew that.

I remember Dear Husband visiting us, and my Mom was weak and had to sit on the commode. I could not do it alone. He helped me get her out of bed, helped set her ont he commode, and then he sat on the bed and just talked to her like they were having coffee. This is something that normally would have horrified them both............and as bothersome as it is to share this very intimate moment........with strangers.......it is imperative that I do share it.

I remember watching that moment and my heart growing, so big that it hurt me. In that moment I saw his true self, and felt the guilt for everytime I said an unkind word, or barked at him for leaving his socks on the floor, or yelled at him for being late..................

He is a selfless and thoughtful man. The best kind of man. He is the kind of man you want to father your children. You want your daughter and son to be lucky enough to have a Daddy like that.

The phone has been ringing off the hook since his return home, his "men" he was deployed with miss him something terrible. They tell me how lucky they felt to have him there with them, they tell me more stories of his selflessness. They want to make sure that I know how lucky I am.

I do.


vw bug said...

go to imageshack.us and start loading up those pictures. It's easy and free.

What a wonderful celebration! 14 years. I can't wait until my Hubby and I reach that point.

Anonymous said...

Happy Happy Anniversary! LOL - I've got you beat by 12 years... y'all are gonna have to work hard to catch up. *grin* May you have many many more!

Anonymous said...


Duck! Flying champagne cork! :-)