Monday, August 29, 2005

On Being Dash's Mom Part II

This is part II...On Being Dash's Mom

So when I left this story a few nights ago, Dash was 18 months old, and able to read some words. I recall a Drs. Visit, his 18 month check up an immunization. We walk in the office, and Dash reads the following signs, EXIT, WELL, SICK, CHECK_OUT, FIRE ALARM. The Moms in the waiting room, look at us, and pretend they did not hear my baby reading. I walk in with the intention of telling them, there is something wrong with my son. "He doesn't smile, coo, run in circles like a baby. He is serious, he looks worried, he does not transition well at all." I want to know if they have seen this before, I want to know if my Dash will be ok. The nurses came in, and were dumbfounded by Dash, all of the nurses in the place come in the room, just to see this reading 18 month old. They write words on the paper cover on the examination table, and he reads every word. The amazement of the nursing staff told me *they REALLY don't see this often*. So the Dr. Comes in and take a looksie at Dash, and the Dr. asks about milestones, and Dash is meeting the normal 18 month milestones, just not with the same fervor as other children. He is too busy counting, reading, inspecting things and golfing that dressing himself, and potty training are taking a backseat. The Dr. Looks at me, and tells me that maybe I should backoff on the fashcard, etc. (Mind you we had no flashcards at this time.) I told the Dr. I was not teaching this child, this child had taught himself. I also told the Dr. A reading 18 month old benefited us very little, I would prefer him to be potty training, and happy like a normal 18 month old". The Dr. Looked at me like I was a crazy Mom, and we left.

I left the office that day, with this in my head. **No one understands this, so follow your gut, and you will be fine, do whatever you can in the best interests of this child**

Well Dash continued to amaze us, and by 2 years old Dash was reading books, children's level one books. He could sight read most words. He was counting to 30, and backwards from 10. He took books, and catalogs to bed to help him get to sleep. He could identify things in the grocery, that we would purchase. Cascade, Tide, Bounty....He could read signs in the grocery, and could weigh the produce.

Dearest husband was deployed and Dash would recall places we had been together, and things they had done together. He recalled people from meeting them one or two times. He could recall directions to someone's house, by landmarks, he would give the schematics of the house from a basement.

Once he perfected golf, and counting money, he lost interest. Since I was alone, and with a new baby and breastfeeding, and a precocious toddler, I started letting Dash watch a movie in the afternoon. It gave me a chance to lie down and nurse the baby and I thought would entertain Dash. I tried the usual Disney fare, he did not like the cartoonist look of things, so I put in Stuart Little one day.

He fell in love with movies and words, he insisted I put the subtitles on, so he could read along, became curious about the meaning of words... Liked memorizing words to the songs of Jungle Book. You do not know how relieved I am to see him dancing and singing "bare neccesities". He can joke now, and tease, he laughs at joke. He is communicating with us so much better. Although there are still those times when I swear, he looks through us, and hears nothing....He is listening to his wheels in his head turn. He is curious about music, and is reading at about a grade 2 level, he has taken an interest in Spanish. This has been good for all of us. We are all forced to work on our Spanish. He will also sit in his room and build and construct elaborate railways and roadways, only to tear them down and build bigger and better transit systems.

That brings us to date, on the short road anyway....There have been so many things to remember. Like the kid simply didn't like to be cuddled until he was about 22 months old, and the moment he curled into me, willingly.....I cried, tears of joy.

Dash is slowly growing into himself, he seems happier. The baby that cried for hours at a time, doesn't cry too often anymore and neither does his Momma....

I can't wait to see what is next, and I am so glad God thought I deserved him.....


momto3 said...

As a mom of a 3 year old with similar development I much enjoyed reading your post. When we first noticed how different our guy was the hairs on the back of my neck would literally stand on end. It's always been hard for me to talk about because people get weird. I am learning to relax more into who he is but still worry about how to accommodate his needs in the future. Right now we are just letting him lead the way. I look forward to hearing more about your journey. :)

Anonymous said...

My hubbie and I are truly blessed with our pigeon pair, two beautiful kids, a boy and a girl. Our son has similiar characteristics and developement progress as yours. It has been a long and lonely road, as we only discovered he was gifted a year ago. It is a really chanllege and so hard to talk to anyone about it because they just don't understand and look totally blank at you. I look forward to hearing more about your journeys with your special ones. All I wanted was just a normal kid but now I am starting to understand and am honoured that God wanted our little chap to be ours. All the best for the future