Wednesday, October 26, 2005

On Losing A Parent Slowly

"I heard that my mother is dead. I wish I had time to let her die. I wish I had time to wish I had. It is because the wild and outraged earth too soon too soon too soon. It's not that I wouldn't and will not it's that it is too soon too soon too soon." Dewey Dell, p. 114 As I Lay Dying, by William Faulkner.....


I stopped over at the Java Diva's place. To find a post that struck me at my core, and I wanted to sit with her over a cup of coffee. I know this road...I have been down it before. I cannot tell you which paths or turns to take , or which to avoid. The path of grief is a tricky one and it is all your own.

In my case, waiting for death, was the hardest part, and the easiest part. However, my selfish need to have and keep my Mother on this planet was soon outweighed by her suffering.

Some folks say, One day at a time, I say, one second at a time, one step at a time. This experiance, is a lovely and painful one, it is one you will think of often, so if you have to dance in the hallway, do it.

If it is any comfort, they are never really gone. You will have to listen harder but you can still hear them.

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