That was then, this is now

When DH and I lived at Fort Bragg, we drove to the beach any time we had more than 6 hours to spend there. Not kidding. We spent almost every weekend after March at Cure Beach. It has been a long time since I have had my feet in the sand. The last time I visited the Ocean, I was 21, or 22, and bikini clad, and sleeping on a towel , golden brown, the only worry being that of maintaining an even tan and turning over every couple of hours.

We managed to get to Oak Island, North Carolina on Thursday, ( I think it was Thursday , do not ask me what day it is, or the time it is currently) we were greeted by dolphins, that I had mistaken for sharks. They must have been 30 feet from the shore. At least 8 of them, behind a trail of Pelicans.

So we went indoors, and Sir Rowland, and Pink Ninja had their swimsuits on, in 5 seconds. So with white fine sand under our feet, and a cool breeze we headed to the water. The Collective, took off like a shot towards the surf, like they were invincible, like we live at the beach. This absolutely freaked me. I just knew they would aspirate on sea water, or be taken out to sea only to be eaten by a shark.

So I stood in the freezing surf, begging my smiling and giggling children to "stop right there, no further." Anxiety rising, and welling. And all of a sudden I was dreading bringing my children to the beach. For selfish reasons mostly. Frankly, I was in no mood to scream at children, and keep them from drowning for 4 days. Not fun. I wanted to sit in my skirted Mom haltini, sip on an ice cold coke. No screaming, no saving any one's life. Just sit, attempt some semblance of a tan. Maybe read a book, thumb through a better Homes and Gardens. Nothing. Just sit, and catalog the sounds, and smells for a day when I need them. But no screaming and life saving.

The Evil Knievel, dare devil like behavior only lasted for one dose of seawater in the face and up the nose....and it was over.

Pink Ninja spent the rest of the time creating tidal pools, making Sand cookies, and collecting every shell within reach. Sir Rowland created vast forts, cities, roadways, and sand creations...

and guess what, I sat in the sand and helped craft sand castles decorating them with shells, making bridges out of reeds, and cataloguing memories for a day when i need them.

No life saving....and I watched the Mother of the 12 month old running all over the beach after the little fat feet for hours, while her Husband sat in his lounger and I thought....

what a complete Bastard.