Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Pretty bad when I have to reread things to figure out what has been going on..

OK, let me see.

My Father's fiancee continues to be in a rehab facility, both arms are out of casts, she is still doing PT for a large portion of her day, her left leg looks rough. I am sure it is an infection, but unsure of her medication regime etc...((It has been hard, but I decided when this happened, she has 4 children, she is not immediate family, and I would keep my mouth shut) This is this families business, so I backed out. I go to visit, and offer support. I do not need to be in the middle of this. My Father, whom has adult onset diabetes, 7 stents sitting in his chest cavity is with her most days and some nights, sleeping in her recliner in her room. (Been there done that with my own mother, and it wiped me out financially, emotionally etc) So I am worried about him, but this is his business as well, he is a big boy.

DH has just returned from a month long trip to Afghanistan. The trip was to familiarize himself with the current conditions, mission etc. He will return soon for a year. The month was long, and lonely...and full of anxiety and insomnia. Which frankly is making me dread the year ahead of us. His homecoming has been nice, being missed is good. SR did better than PN . SR does not overthink people situations, it is what it is (the Aspergers works in my favor here). PN on the other hand has also been having insomnia, bad dreams, grinding her teeth, and has a nasty case of TMJ at age 7. Ughh...PN missed her Daddy something fierce, and just seemed out of sorts for the month. Unsure how I can help her cope better.

DH's broken right radial head is healing slowly but surely. He REALLY missed the kids while away, this time is different for us, there is a relationship between him and both children...the last 2 times we did this...the kids were itty, no explanation required. I thought this was hard when they were teeny, this trumps that. I assure you.

SR just got character student of the week in ART, yes the same teacher who really was confused by him last year. Things are looking up. PE , the one thing I really thought would be a problem area this year, due to games, scorekeeping, the noise, and nature of 3rd grade gym, is awesome. SR has 2 PE teachers, both good, but one has really connected with him, and they get along just fine. SR just maxed out his PE test for the year, and scored in the top 4 of of 150 in his sex and age group in cardio. Pretty amazing for a bookish child, who would rather read than run. I will credit DH with this, as the 2 of them rode over 200 miles last year on bikes. All accounts of SR in classroom are good. God is Good. His IEP is in place, he has a para to help him through the day gets sensory breaks, does not have to eat in the cafeteria. He studies in the afternoon with his mentors, one in science, and one in math. He loves algebra, struggled a but with geometry.

PN is doing well, and enjoys her advanced reading and math group. She like school, and loves the social aspect of it, she continues to keep busy with her art, and is now reading Junie B. Jones books, and likes them. I am proud of er for keeping an eye out for SR at school. She also wants piano and art lessons. She is my organized and internally motivated child.

I am good, working about 38 hours a week, and learning a lot. We just installed a TMS machine, and I am really hoping to see success with it. They are currently working with TMS, in older Aspergians, experimenting, trying to engage the parts of the brain that do not seem to be engaged. I am always excited to hear about new treatments and research for autism...it has been ignored for too long.

I need to spring clean, get living room carpets cleaned, paint PN's room, and get motivated. I loathed winter...loathed it, hated it.

We are headed to Hawaii soon, DH, the kids, and I. We are actually going to get a long break on the beach, sun on our skin, listening to the ocean...it is certain to be an awesome way to spend our 20 year anniversary. I needed something to kickstart me for the upcoming year. We are also planning a trip on his return, unsure what yet, have thought about hiking across Utah, London, Greece, Belize...anything.

Currently life is good, overwhelming but good, learning bounderies, and better time management.


Trish in WA said...

I'm sorry that PN is having a hard time when her daddy is gone. Being a military kid isn't easy, nor is being a military wife. My husband is AF Reserve and also works for the FAA. He travels quite a bit for both of his jobs. We have two kids, and when a trip or TDY takes dad away for an extended period of time, I've found giving our daughter one of her daddy's t-shirts to sleep in (though it swallows her!) helped her quite a bit. Not totally, but it made her time away from him manageable. Our son is older and seems to handle the separations a bit better. As for me, I have a Rx for Ambian CR that helps me sleep during those times that he's away and Costco has a decent sleep aid too. A year is a long time, I wish you the very best.

cady544 said...

Wow, first time I ever read this site and stumbled on your blog. I am an avid prayer-er... will pray for your family. Hearing the inside track on sleeping, not sleeping and your husband's reactions to leaving and how he feels makes it all so personal. Just know someone is praying for you all. God Bless America and you!!!

Bou said...

Have you told your dentist about her grinding? He can make a mouth guard for her to wear at night and it will help prevent the TMJ situation you have going on.

I was living PNs life at her age. My Dad was deployed a lot. He was deployed to 'nam when I was born, but as you said, it is different then. I struggled. The first 30 days and the last were the worst. The in between... were a blur of activities my Mom constantly tried to think of. No phones or internet so we weren't able to speak to him at all during that time... they used to send tapes back and forth to hear each other's voice. I look back on those times now and wonder... how did my Mom do it?