I watch the ripples change their size
But never leave the stream
Of warm impermanence and
So the days float through my eyes
~David Bowie
Some days it seems as if the changes here are more apparent than others.
This morning was one of those.
We were getting ready to head to the gym. The usual drill... Me making everyone hurry through breakfast, then help people dress, remind people to use toilets, brush teeth. I, in the past have ended up doing most of, or at least completing most of these tasks. Usually stopping an argument or wrestling match half way through. Dreading the "getting ready to leave the house" routine.
This morning was different. I got them each yogurt, a slice of banana bread, and fruit. They sat and ate quietly. I laid out clothes, and they dressed without me prompting and prompting and prompting. Even down to the socks and shoes.
They brushed teeth without being asked multiple times.
We had extra time to dawdle to the gym, not enough time for me to revel in my success as a parent.
Because in my book, this morning was a success as a parent. It may not sound like much to most of you. Some of you without kids, think "well that is how it should be everyday", and 6 years ago I would have agreed. But now I know different.
This morning was wonderful. I watched my children do things independently, without nagging or whip cracking.....It was a pleasure.
They were praised as well, I was proud of them.
They are growing indeed, and I have been realizing for quite some time I am no longer toddler mom.
Long gone are the days of me following them at the park from piece of equipment, to piece of equipment, saving them from themselves (and me from hefty medical expenses).
Long gone are the days of me trying to leave them at the gym in the nursery only to see them screaming. Trying to meditate in yoga only to hear the cries of an infant or toddler. Wondering if those are the cries of my child or another, or if I will have to exit class early, to sooth some frightened infant. Those days that seem like yesterday, are GONE. Almost hard to imagine now. Now they have friends and mentors there. Sir Rowland even hugging his "teacher" there, making sure she had a good Christmas.
And the other day, as Sir Rowland blew out his birthday cake candles. He announced his wish. "I want you to play with me". A Simple wish, and I smiled, and his Daddy smiled.
An easy wish, a sweet wish.
On the phone two days ago with a guidance councilor, finding out then whens and whys of kindergarten registration this month for Sir Rowland. Was almost an out of body experience for me.
Running into the gym this morning, carrying Pink Ninja in the rain as she was kind enough to share her umbrella.
These children are growing, and it is warm impermanence.
Thursday, January 04, 2007
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